The year is 2050, and the world has run out of font styles. The last remaining font designer has been kidnapped by rogue font nerds who demand that all fonts be made of pure, unadulterated FontNerds code.
Deploy a Font Containment Unit (FCU) to capture and contain the rogue font nerds. The FCU is a highly trained team of font specialists equipped with advanced FCU-Tools to detect and contain font anomalies.
Use Font-ification to transform the font into a safe, non-threatening font. This involves applying a layer of Font-ification Methods to the font, making it unreadable by the font nerds.
Font-erize the font by removing all unnecessary characters and replacing them with Font-erization Techniques. This will make the font unappealing to the font nerds, rendering them powerless.
THE FONTS ARE UNDER SIEGE!